Sex Academy by Spurr Pam

Author:Spurr, Pam [Dr Pam Spurr]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781849543453
Publisher: Biteback Publishing
Published: 2012-02-21T16:00:00+00:00

Academy body confidence tips

Let’s get your body hang-ups banished from your bedroom:

If you have any issues pleasuring yourself because you think your body is unattractive, overweight and/or misshapen then give yourself ‘permission’ to get to know your body. Remind yourself it’s completely natural to touch yourself.

Think back to where these feelings originated – maybe your parents told you off when they caught you touching yourself in your bedroom. Allow your rational mind to take charge over negative feelings from childhood about self-pleasure. It’s no one’s business what you do to yourself in private.

Give yourself daily reminders of your sexiest attribute – maybe you have a naughty smile or cheeky glint in your eye. Value these special little things about yourself.

Every day find a quiet place, close your eyes and relax while visualising yourself as a sex goddess or sex god. Keep this image in mind and use lots of detail to make it spring to life. Hang onto it – you can be that god or goddess!

Increasing body confidence takes practice so spoil yourself – get something sexy to wear and strut around in it at home. At first you’ll feel silly but gradually you will think, ‘Hmmm, I don’t look so bad after all!’

Next practise slipping out of your clothes slowly and confidently in front of a mirror. You’ll soon feel confident getting out of your sexy gear when you’re with your partner.

With all the practice in the world you still might end up getting a zip stuck when your partner is lying on the bed waiting for you – learn to laugh at such moments!

When it comes to choosing the things to wear around your partner choose outfits that accentuate your good attributes. Be proud to flaunt those – whether it’s your breasts, bottom, legs, shoulders, etc. We all have one good attribute.

If possible transform your best attribute into an erogenous zone – flaunt it so that your partner has easy access to caress and kiss it.

So you think you’re the only one with body issues? Think again – that new lover or long-term partner probably has as many body image issues as you do.

Just as you should with general negative thoughts, learn to suppress negative thoughts about your body. Tell yourself things like nobody’s perfect, no one who cares about you is going to worry about lumps and bumps, etc. You can spend your life wishing you had a smaller bum or bigger breasts or you can spend your time thinking about more important things.

Try training your mind to feel sexier by weaving sexiness into your daily life; try wearing nice, silky underwear to work.

Continue such mind-training by doing things like running your hands over your erogenous zones – not as in masturbation but just feel how nice your skin is to touch. This helps your general sensuality.

Again, I’m going to remind you that sexual partners rarely pay as much attention to our real or imagined lumps and bumps. They usually get an eyeful of what they like and ignore the rest.

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